literature

Echoes of the Mind - Ch.25

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Chapter 25
Confessions


A/N: Thank you so much for all of the amazing reviews.  I am so grateful for each and everyone. This chapter is slightly shorter than my typical ones, but don't worry - Sundays chapter will made up for it in a big way!

Erik x Charles = Don't Like it? Don't Read it.  Have a lovely Day!

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Erik didn't so much a flinch when Raven slammed the door behind him. He crossed the room and leaned against the open window. He crossed his arms loosely over his chest and watched her. He wasn't entirely sure why Charles had sent him to speak to her. He was hardly the most adept with emotional women or for that matter, emotions in general.

Raven had retained her blue form but looked every bit the upset young woman she tried so hard not to be. From the first time Erik had met her she was trying to be older and tougher. She would never be satisfied with what she was. He felt certain that it was that trait which had brought her to his room the night before the mission.

She wrung her hands and paced the small path way from her bed to the door a few times. Clearly, she was waiting on Erik to say something. She was accustom to Charles being there when she felt this upset. He always knew just what to say in that soft understanding tone. He knew just when she needed a hug or someone to remind her of her priorities.  

But no, here she was stuck with Erik. One of the many people she was angry with.

Just peachy.

Erik wondered which would hold out longer her silence or the floorboards.

"What the hell do I have to say to get you to leave?" She finally shouted.

Floorboards win.

He just watched her in reply, a fact which infuriated her all the more.

"Leave." She had a hand over her mouth and he noted that it was trembling as she tried to keep what little composure she had retained.

Erik shook his head. "No."

Raven sat down in a slump on the foot of her bed as she gave up the battle of crying. By now Charles would have hugged her and talked her down from the emotional swan dive she was doing. Not Erik, he was by the window as indifferent as ever.

"It is your fault." Raven started and Erik raised his chin slightly to look at her with a  questioning look. She continued staring at her feet on the carpet. "As much as its anyone's."

"You are going to have to clarify that one." Erik spoke for the first time, outside of a one word reply.

She swallowed heavily, trying to keep her emotions from causing her to lose it completely. "I was fine like this." She never looked at him as her body morphed back into the blonde haired beauty she was when he had first met him.

"I was hiding, but that was ok - Any guy on the street thought I was pretty." She spoke with her eyes still on the carpet. "Then here came - you. All that bull shit about self acceptance. You even kissed me, and told me not to hide myself. You made me think that for one second someone might like me the way I actually looked."

She hastily wiped ears away from her face. Erik noticed her right eye kept shifting back and for between yellow and blue.  She was barely keeping her focus enough to hold the shape. "So then I thought, well Hank liked me as a blonde bombshell and he is really sweet - he gets what I am talking about. That went poof when you maybe me think absurdly that someone might think that I am attractive like this!" She gestured vaguely at herself as she returned to her natural blue form.

She held her head in her hands. Erik felt sorry for the girl, he honestly did. He did not intend to mislead her but he still stood by his words. He felt that she should be herself and in time someone would love her for that. He just hadn't meant that someone to be Azazel. For now Erik let her ramble, even as emotionally stunted as he was, he knew that she needed to vent.

"So when the time came I made my choice. I went with you. I left Charles bleeding on the beach with a bullet in his back to run off with you."  Each time Raven said you it sounded like an attack. Of course, it was an attack.

Erik retained his silence but his eyes had dropped slightly.  

"So I come to you afterwards, and I am brushed off like a kid. All the while Angel was in there with you!" Raven snapped.

Erik looked up. "Angel needed someone to talk to - and nothing more. That is all she got." He corrected her carefully.

Given Angels previous profession, he understood why Raven would jump to the conclusion. He had more or less be raised by Shaw, he knew his methods. He also knew that Angel had likely dealt with a great deal more than she would  have told anyone. Erik, having experienced Shaw at his worst for many years,  understood.

Raven hesitated for a moment and looked at him. She hadn't really expected Erik to respond. She seemed surprised to find Erik looking at her and that broke her tirade for a moment. She quieted and swallowed nervously. This was the part of the story she didn't want to go into it but the silence from Erik seemed to state, with out words, that he was waiting.

"I was upset. He called me beautiful and you a fool for not wanting me… I needed to know that someone wasn't disgusted by me." She said the second part like it was an excuse for a crime, the desperation in her tones made Erik want to believe her plea.

"It was only one time." Her voice was nearly lost in the silence of the room. "I never meant to hurt anyone, I don't know why Hank is so angry. It wasn't like we were ever together."

"Did he know that?" Erik posed the question softly.

Her silence gave him all the answer he needed.

Raven stood up her movement slightly unstable for having been so upset earlier. "Am I so revolting?" She asked looking towards the mirror and he reflection cast there.

"So revolting, that you'll sleep with Emma Frost but not with me?" She asked in a quiet broken tone.

"What!?" Erik was so taken aback by her suggestion he forgot to be considerate of her concerns.

She looked away as if he had already given her the answer.

Erik stood up and came to stand behind her in the mirror. "Raven. You are a beautiful creature. I meant that when I said it. A damn sight prettier than Emma Frost if I may make that much clear."  

She shook her head, watching in irritation as the blue creature in the mirror did the same.  "Then why did she say that, about taking the wrong shape?"

Erik paused and his eyes dropped in silence.

"See?" She sounded bitter.
"Raven, I am sorry if I misled you before the mission." He started. "I stand by what I said. The right person will come along and he will appreciate you for who you are. That person is not m--"

Raven had turned and kissed him. Rather it was to prove his point or hers, was unclear. Regardless of her intention, his reaction was undeniable. He braced either hand on her shoulders and took a step back away from her. The hands on her shoulders kept her from following him.

"Raven!" Erik sounded frustrated, and could not ignore the fact that he felt like Charles was spying.

"See. You are disgusted." Raven hissed before stepping away from him. "Azazel, at least he had the decency to act like he enjoyed himself.  You and Hank you are both the same ."

Erik watched her walk away with a growing level of frustration bubbling inside him. "Good heavens Raven - just because a  man fucks you doesn't mean he is the better choice."

The frankness of his response seemed to take her off her guard.

"You were drunk as they come on New Years eve and Hank didn't sleep with you. Frankly, as screwed up as my moral values are even I can see which makes more of  a man." Erik snapped.

Yes, she was hurt and justifiably so - Erik didn't deny that. However, Erik wasn't about to be thrown under the bus alone.

"Now, you can bitch and moan about men like the rest of the female populace or you can take some accountability for your actions - suck it up and make better choices." Erik's tone had strengthened from before. Inwardly he wondered when  he started lecturing about being accountable for your actions.

Raven looked at him with a glare that would have killed the strongest of men. He was already bracing himself for whatever she decided to throw at him when she did the highly unexpected thing of slumping back onto the bed in tears.

Erik shook his head and thought:  No Charles, I've done my bit you are not sticking me with this emotional train wreck a moment longer.  

Rather or not the telepath heard him was un clear. Erik had crossed to the door and had the handle in his hand when Raven spoke.

"What is your type?" She asked quietly.

"What?" He had not turned back to face her.

"You told Hank that I wasn't your type - what is?" Raven asked.

Erik was already thinking up a thousand different answers before he heard himself answer the one he had not authorized. "Charles."

There was a moment where both Raven and Erik seemed equally surprised with his answer.  Raven stared at him and Erik managed to meet her eyes unwaveringly.

"Charles." She started quietly "CHARLES?!" She followed in a far louder volume, Erik was suddenly quite glad he had not yet opened the door.

Raven was on her feet and in Erik's face in under two strides.  

"This is just rich!" She shouted a closed fist hitting his chest with out enough force to bother him enough to stop her.

"Charles! My dear bookworm-love the world - hidden mutation - CHARLES, ends up with you." She stopped hitting him somewhere around hidden mutation and now rested her head on chest seeming completely beaten.

Her reaction confused the hell out of Erik and he was ready to leave and let someone else deal with her. That was until he heard in final words just barely above a whisper.

"He gets everything that I want…and I get pregnant"

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Thank you to everyone who is reading this story!
Check back tomorrow to see some things start together as their world falls apart.
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(And don't kill me ^.^ )
Please don't kill me - I promise there is a method to my madness.
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DethhKat's avatar
Omg omg omg omg omg!!!! This is freakin fantastic!!!!